dating white people is complicated. dating is a mess for me, i am not a good at it. in the past i have attributed this to being a gemini, other times to how i haven’t been modeled healthy love and always to the fucked ways media and mainstream society programs us to believe systems of attraction and accept internalized oppression in order to be desired. dating white people for me hasn’t all been all bad comedies or tragedies. i am willing to share a few short stories and lessons that i have gained from dating white people.
my first girlfriend was white. i was a drunk and she was the bartender at my favorite bar, it was the perfect relationship i thought. it lasted 3 months. i didn’t know what i wanted, wasn’t fully aware about my participation in oppression and because of this i got tokenized. i met her aesthetic, her ex was also a person of color and i “reminded” her of the feeling she got with her [insert puke noises here]. after we broke up (it was text message break up btw) i went to her work on her day off, got drunk and cried like they do in some in ranchera songs. i was all kinds of cheesy-novela-heartbreak-scene at that moment. what i learned though was that if i’m dating a white person and they have a preference for dark skin then i am a prop and they don’t value all of me and will most likely pull some shit like break up via a text message. we are still facebook friends and last time i saw her she was wearing culturally appropriative clothes and i just took a deep breath and thanked my ancestors that it ended when it did because i would probably continue to be a fashion accessory to her if we stayed together longer.
Reblogged from wifwolf